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I am proud to say that I was never even peripherally associated with the purchase of a robotic singing mounted bass. Some of you young people may not even remember how popular these things were. I have to assume that many of them are now taking up space in landfills. Some of them may even be in the ocean.

They are always the first object that I think of when I am thinking about pointless plactic novelty items that should never have existed. Disco Santa is number two on the list. The latest thing from China is a USB drumming Santa. It is awful.

I am hesitant about suggesting Christmas presents because of all the expectations and emotional baggage that exists in most families. The really young would probably get a lot of joy from a wooden farm animal set.